Monday, May 10, 2010

Advice for philandering males

With the hope it will save us all from another naked and vulnerable public unveiling.

Jean-Auguste-Dominique Ingres Study of a Nude

A Private Indiscretion and the Subsequent Public Outrage

'Impropriety' is often the battle cry of the charmingly unsophisticated in their rush to save those too weak of mind to see the heretics in their midst. It was definitely so during the election season, resoundingly so at the height of Clinton-gate, and it continues to be so with each new disgraced celebrity philanderer.

Judgmental pundits with unchecked fanatical devotion to family values are left to spout, with bias, speculation often of their own making to the seemingly insatiable multitude amongst which you are counted if you do not let your voices be heard.

Rail with your distaste for an establishment that has made marriage the mark of morality and competence to execute public office. Let it be known that you value the humane treatment for this recently outed prodigal who was once a cherished darling. Tell them you will no longer tolerate any indiscreet paramours with their sudden attacks of conscience that benefit naught but their own profit-seeking ends.

It's bad business this.

These women who enter willingly into the affairs with foreknowledge of their lover’s state of matrimony and whom, we assume, vow discretion only to pretend a lapse of judgement once faced with the media scrutiny created by their disloyal utterance.

Certainly, there is plenty profit to be had from this unholy alliance, but it should be negotiated between the women – these days seemingly uglier than the cuckolded wife - and the now dethroned prince of pleasure – substitute name of latest tarnished athlete, politician or actor – long before this most private matter becomes the fodder of pious zealots.

A dalliance is an inevitability for which there aught to be a contingency for every affluent fellow with a healthy sexual appetite. There are long established rules that govern these sorts of arrangements from as far back as the household of the biblical lord Abraham to the decadent court of the England’s fat Prince Regent, and it is advised for the modern gentlemen of means to employ them.

You have fortunes gentleman. Let it pay your way for it does not bode well for our society if prudence in matters of believed immorality are practiced solely by brothers living on the down low and the Catholic Church when covering up the ills of their priests.

You do that and the rest of us rational adults will gage our response accordingly. We will not let it be believed that our protest of your public castration is a sign of our support of infidelity, nor will we subscribe to the notion that your weakness of flesh is a sign of more than your humanity.

My love, my care,


  1. well versed... a time I will never forget... walking into a room full of politicians and over hearing one of them say, "Behind every great man is an even greater woman; and behind her is the mistress" harharhar everyone chuckles

  2. Phew - what a steamy life you live, Simone. Pubic Outrage?

  3. Marriage is no longer the 'mark of morality' over here in Europe. Marriage is either seen as 'old fashioned', or a sure way to lose all your cash.

    Bisou, Cro.

  4. You never fail to have a very interesting post. :-)

  5. today is art appreciation day.